This morning, I woke up sore, and hungry. So, I went to the R-PAC [the nearby cutting-edge gymnasium], and got some food, and I came back, and I was walking through the lobby, and decided to stop and get the mail.

So I looked through the mailbox window, and saw an envelope. I tore open the mailbox door to find that the envelope [see Exhibit A.]was addressed to a Mr. Andrew Clark [my brother, who lives in Indiana], but had my [Columbus, Ohio] address on it. The envelope came from a J Clark in Grand Blanc, Michigan. At which time I noted that it was likely that my father, who travels to Michigan quite often, meant to send Andy something, and could have just mixed up our addresses.

So I contacted my brother, and got approval to open this envelope. So I opened it. [see Exhibit B.]It contained a dusty sleep mask, covered in hair and some kind of fuzz.

After a brief discussion with my brother, about the contents of this envelope, I immediately called my parents. They didn’t send it.

Your thoughts?